


Sleep Happy

by Fidomom



Category: Roswell (TV 1999)
Genre: #AU, #Candy, #M&M, #MandM, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:48:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25878418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fidomom/pseuds/Fidomom
Summary: Maria's reason for feeling happy is the same as her reason for feeling sad; Michael.
Relationships: Maria DeLuca/Michael Guerin





	Sleep Happy

**Author's Note:**

> AU timeline after Season 1 Destiny and after summer break; ignores Season 2 from Skin And Bones and subsequent episodes up to Harvest, inclusive.
> 
> Special thanks to RoswellOracle for the Series Timeline guide. The only unchanged thing is that Maria tried repeatedly to get Michael to get back together with her and did not succeed.
> 
> Also, there's a random Easter egg in this, for any Final Fantasy 8 fans who might be reading it. It wasn't intentional, it's just that it popped into my head for the scene, as I was writing it. My inner FF8 fangirl approved, so I used it. :D
> 
> ~FM :)

**Disclaimer:** This is a work of fiction. It is only loosely based on characters from the 1999-2002 tv series Roswell as I imagine they could be from different points throughout and beyond the three seasons of the show. I am not affiliated with any of the original creations nor creators from the series. I will make no monetary gains from publishing this work of fiction.  
  
 **Sleep Happy  
by _Fidomom_**  
  
It was only the first week of school, since summer break and Maria was at her school locker, distracted, as usual, thinking about Michael, wondering if she was ever going to get through to him and convince him to get back together. She was jolted from her thoughts by a quiet female voice addressing her. She took a few moments to process that it wasn't anyone in her usual circle of friends, so she missed what the girl had actually said. She admitted as much and asked, "I'm sorry my head is all over the place and I didn't quite get what you just said. Will you repeat that please?"  
  
The girl smiled cautiously and asked, "Is it true you and Michael Guerin are broken up?"  
  
Maria was instantly jealous and she asked, "Why? Do you have your sights set on him or something? All I can tell you is, good luck. You're going to need it."  
  
The girl put her hand on Maria's arm, as Maria tried to storm off and she refuted Maria's suspicions, "No! I'm not asking for me. My brother wants to ask you ... something but he doesn't want to piss off your boyfriend, if you still have one."  
  
Maria paused and asked, "What does he want to ask me that might piss off my bo- I mean my ex-boyfriend?"  
  
The girl skirted the question and asked for confirmation, "So it is true; you two broke up? Rumor is for a few months already? So does that mean it's for good?"  
  
Maria was getting irritated. The girl was rubbing salt in what felt like fresh wounds to her. She snarked in annoyance, "You're sure asking a lot of personal questions little miss Nosy Parker. I think we're done here, m'kay?"  
  
The girl persisted, "Please just tell me? It's important! I've never played go between for Vincent before and if I screw this up, he's not going to take me to the Hanson concert and our parents won't let me go on my own. Please?"  
  
Maria's attitude toward the girl softened and she directed her irritation to the girl's mystery, presumably older, brother, instead. Maria sighed and said, "Listen, I think your big brother gave you a sucky errand to run. Not only do I refuse to answer but you tell him for me that if he doesn't take you to Hanson then whatever question he wants to ask me it's an automatic no or whichever answer he doesn't want me to give him. Whatever. Tell Vincent to do his own dirty work. Seriously, that's just mean holding Hanson hostage on you like that."  
  
*****  
  
After lunch, Maria was at her locker getting books for her afternoon classes when suddenly a boy appeared beside her. He smiled nervously and spoke, "Uhh, hi, Maria. Sorry for sending my little sister to ask you that stuff earlier. I just didn't want your bo- uhh Michael Guerin to kick my ass."  
  
Maria raised one brow at him and admonished, "Yeah, not your smoothest move. And shame on you for holding Hanson over her head! Well, whatever. Since you're here and doing your own leg work, now, what is it you wanted to ask me, Vincent?"  
  
Maria finally noticed he was kind of cute as he fidgeted, blushed and stammered, "I know this might seem out of the blue to you but I was trying to work up the courage to ask you this even before you started dating your ex. I'm a painter. I'm trying to build up my portfolio. I do head shot portraitures. I think you are the most beautiful girl in school and I want to paint a portrait of you to put in my portfolio. It takes time though; like several separate sittings. Would you consider sitting for me? I don't need an answer right away. And if you want proof that I do paint portraits, I'd be happy to show you my current portfolio, as thin as it still is."  
  
Maria smiled at him warmly and held a hand over her heart as she said, "Aww! That's the nicest question I've ever been asked! I do want to see your work before I agree to anything in concrete terms but you pretty much had me at you think I'm beautiful."  
  
Vincent looked stunned and he asked, "Wait, yes? Did you just say yes?"  
  
Maria nodded still smiling at him. He beamed a grateful smile at her and gushed, "This is so amazing! Thank-you, so much! I will try my best to do you justice! Umm can I give you my number and you can just call me whenever you aren't busy to set up a sitting schedule and also of course for you to come over and look through my portfolio. I don't bring my completed works to school or I'd just show it to you now."  
  
Maria agreed and accepted his phone number on a torn piece of paper. She felt a smile inside for the rest of the afternoon.  
  
*****  
  
After her shift at the Crashdown Cafe ended she went home and found Michael sitting on her stoop. He got to his feet as she approached and he started lecturing her, "You gotta stop this, Maria. It's not going to work. We aren't getting back together. You dangling some preppy guy in my face is not going to change my mind. I didn't think you had it in you to use someone and string them along just to make me jealous. Not cool at all. Just cut him loose before you hurt him, like I wound up hurting you."  
  
Maria just gaped at him incredulously for several seconds and then she ranted at him, "There are so many issues I have with everything you just said to me, Michael, but the worst of it is your arrogance and your automatic assumption that if some guy is paying attention to me it must be because I'm using him, just to make you jealous because obviously no guy would ever actually be interested in me, for me, on my own merits! Right? Screw you, pal-ly! Like you said we aren't together anymore, by your own choice! You can't have it both ways, Michael! You're my ex, so that means you get zero say in whom I do or don't talk to or spend time with! You don't want to be with me anymore, fine! Stay the hell out of my business and my life!", and she shoved past him and ran into the house fuming.  
  
After the anger dissipated came the tears and not for the first nor the last time, Maria cried herself to sleep over Michael Guerin.  
  
*****  
  
Michael kept his distance from her and Maria wasn't sure if she was relieved or sad about that. Maria was sitting for Vincent for ninety minutes twice a week and still the portrait took nearly two months to complete.  
  
Every other sitting Vincent asked her to think of something that made her feel genuinely happy but asked that she not actually smile and on alternate sittings he asked her to think of something that made her feel sad but to again try to keep her mouth neutral. Maria found his requests curious but she managed to do as he'd asked. In both instances the inspiration was the same. She only had to remember something about Michael to achieve the requested feeling.  
  
When Maria finally got to see the completed portrait, she nearly burst into tears that anyone really thought she was that beautiful. She hugged Vincent and kissed him on the cheek as she thanked him, "Thank-you. You have an incredible talent, Vincent and I'm so beyond honoured that you wanted to paint me; that you want to include my portrait in your portfolio. I wish I could show it to my Mom."  
  
Vincent smiled shyly and suggested, "I was hoping you'd say that. I was hoping you'd like it enough to want to show your family and friends, so I took the liberty of making a print of it from a digital photo. Yours to keep, as my thanks to you for sitting for me and for consenting to your image being in my portfolio. Really, Maria you are a very good subject. You made this easy for me."  
  
Amy DeLuca was so enamored of the portrait, that she insisted on inviting Vincent to dinner, along with Liz and her parents, so that Vincent could receive all the praise due him, for his talent. After dinner and before dessert, Amy unveiled the print and everyone lavished praise on Vincent, as expected.  
  
Once the dinner party had broken up and everyone except Liz had left, Maria and Liz sat out on the front stoop together in the dark and had a heart to heart girl talk. Liz asked her, "Any change on the Michael situation?"  
  
Maria scoffed and answered, "Nope. I wish I could say I give up. No, actually, I can say the words just fine but I wish I could mean them and follow through. Why couldn't I fall for someone cute, kind and complimentary like Vincent? Can you even believe that's how he sees me and he already swore to me that he isn't harboring a crush. To him I'm beautiful and he just wanted to paint me the way nature painters like to paint sunsets.  
  
That impressses me so much! Why can't I be harboring a crush on Vincent? Nope not me. Instead, I'm stubbornly in love with a guy who wants nothing to do with me. I don't even know what to do anymore, Liz. I've even considered trying to use sex to get Michael back but then I realised the comedy in that and cried myself to sleep again."  
  
Liz asked Maria in concern, "Comedy? Why would you say that?"  
  
Maria's laugh trembled with tears as she explained, "In order for a seduction to work, Liz, the guy kind of has to already be at least a little interested and Michael has made it very clear that he's just not that into me, so yes, that would have resulted in a comedy, with me as the fool, yet again."  
  
Liz simply hugged her and patted her back. Maria returned the hug, then pulled away and wiped at her teary eyes as she insisted, "I don't want this night to end on a sad note. Someone in this world thinks I'm beautiful and I have proof. For once I want to fall asleep feeling happy about something, again. It's been way too long since I've done that. I can go back to being miserable, tomorrow. You should probably get going, Liz. It's getting late and we have school tomorrow."  
  
Liz nodded, got to her feet, hugged Maria again and suggested, "If you need me, even if it's late, call me okay? Hope you sleep happy tonight, girl. I love you. Goodnight, Maria."  
  
Maria smiled shakily at Liz and agreed, "You know I never check the time before I call you. Love you, too, Lizzie. Goodnight."  
  
Maria stayed on the stoop watching Liz until she'd disappeared from view. She sighed heavily, turned to go in and changed her mind. She wasn't ready to go back inside. She sat down on the stoop again, looked up at the night sky and stopped fighting her tears that she'd only held in check, so that Liz wouldn't worry. She rested her eyes against her forearm and cried as quietly as she could, so that her Mom wouldn't hear her and come out.  
  
She felt a hand caressing her hair and assumed her Mom had caught her and snuck up on her, in spite of her efforts to be quiet. Without looking up Maria said, "I'll be alright, Mom. It's just silly girl problems. You can go back in. I didn't mean to worry you. I'll pull myself together and come in; I just need a few minutes."  
  
"I'm not your Mom."  
  
Maria lifted her head and turned to look at the person she least expected to see. She blurted out, "Michael. What are you doing here? I didn't hear your bike."  
  
Michael shrugged and explained, "It was a lot noisier inside your house when I got here, that's probably why."  
  
Maria asked suspiciously, "You've been here since before they all left?"  
  
Michael nodded and admitted, "Yeah. I wanted to talk to you but I didn't realise you guys were having a dinner party and I didn't want to intrude. I also didn't want to leave without talking to you so I was just waiting until I was sure you were alone."  
  
Maria looked down at her hands and she asked, "Were you eavesdropping?"  
  
Michael nodded slowly and confessed, "Unintentionally at first but then pretty much very intentionally. What I heard cemented for me what I came here to say, which is I'm sorry, Maria. The whole accusing you of trying to make me jealous. I'm sorry for saying that or thinking that, even for a second. I do know you better than that. You would never do that to anyone."  
  
Maria nodded and asked, "Why'd you stick around just to say that? You could have just said it to me at school tomorrow, instead."  
  
Michael agreed and added, "You're right. I could have but what I overheard you and Liz talking about, isn't something I wanted to mention to you, at school.  
  
Maria, I didn't break up with you because I'm not into you. I don't know how you ever thought that. I broke up with you because I don't trust myself. What I'm capable of and can't control.  
  
That painter guy? Maybe he said it first and he's got the talent to back it up but he is not the only person in the world who thinks you're beautiful or knows you are. I followed him the other day. I talked to him. He was in the print shop. I saw the painting. I uhh convinced him to give me a print, too, and to not tell you. I wanted to say sorry for that, as well. He's a bit scared of me for some reason and I kind of milked it."  
  
Maria clung to the crumb Michael had just dropped and asked, "Why did you bully him into giving you a print of his painting?"  
  
Michael answered quietly, "Because no photograph I've ever seen of you does you justice; his painting of you is the closest I've ever seen to the actual truth and I wanted to be able to see the truth whenever I need to. It's more often than you'd guess."  
  
Maria's eyes teared up and she asked, "Michael are you being intentionally cruel to me, right now?"  
  
Michael's eyes widened earnestly and he denied her accusation, "No! What did I say that was cruel?"  
  
Maria shook her head in exasperation and complained, "It's not just what you're saying; it's everything! You show up here out of the blue, you apologise to me, you keep hinting that you still have feelings for me, yet it seems like you have no intention of reconciling with me! Why are you doing this to me? Why are you getting my hopes up, now, again, after all this time?"  
  
Michael's mouth opened slightly in surprise and he asked, "You still want to get back together with me? Even though I've been a monumental jackass to you for months?"  
  
Maria's tears spilled and she bit out tersely, "If that is a rhetorical question just to satiate your curiosity or your ego or whatever then I'd really appreciate it if you'd just go. Now."  
  
Michael leaned against the stoop hand rail and crossed his arms stubbornly. He insisted, "It wasn't rhetorical or for curiosity or my ego. This next question is for my ego though, why do you still want to get back together with me?"  
  
Maria laughed mirthlessly and answered, "I'd love to know the answer to that myself! I mean really you being a jackass is not a new experience for me, so there's that. I guess maybe I miss having the jackassery softened by moments of seeing my spaceboy. I haven't seen any sign of him in over six months though. Until tonight. It's confusing and hurtful showing me glimpses of him when I don't get to have him back. I miss the whole package. I miss every part of you, Michael."  
  
Michael spoke softly, "I know but don't. You don't have to. I'm right here. I mean I'm still scared. I still can't be sure you'll be safe with me. I'm still in love with you. You don't have the market cornered on crying yourself to sleep on a regular basis. Just because I'm the one who did this to us, doesn't mean it hasn't affected me in similar ways to how it's affected you. I want to get back together with you, Maria. Can we go steady again?"  
  
Maria narrowed her eyes suspiciously and she asked in an accusatory tone, "Is this because I told Liz I was considering having sex with you?"  
  
Michael chuckled softly and answered, "Not that I'd hate that, but no. It's because, I'm miserable without you, and you don't light up when I walk into the room anymore and I can't handle that. I did that to you. I hurt you that much. I don't know if I can reverse it but I want to try. When you were saying goodnight to Liz and talking about falling asleep feeling happy about something, I tried to remember the last time I did that.  
  
It was that time we fell asleep in your Mom's car together while surveilling Tess. It was not the most comfortable I've ever been but I fell asleep happy because I had you snugggled up against me. Kinda weird. I didn't have plushies to sleep with growing up and I legitimately don't like anything mushy or schmoopy but cuddling with you was for real the last time I fell asleep happy."  
  
Maria's suspicious eyes didn't change and she said, "Yeah see that still sounds like you want me to sleep with you and that's why you want us to get back together."  
  
Michael groaned, laughed briefly and reiterated, "Again, I'm not against that idea but it has nothing to do with why I want you back."  
  
Maria asked, "Then why, Michael? Why do you really want us to get back together, now, all this time later? I'm not buying the misery thing as the main reason; you could tough that out - you've already been through much worse than breaking up with your girlfriend."  
  
Michael looked at her without speaking for several seconds and then he fished a rolled up scroll out of his jacket pocket. He unfurled it and placed a hand over one side of the print of her portrait and said, "Because I've seen far too much of this Maria, since we broke up and not nearly enough of this Maria.", and he placed his hand over the other half of the portrait, instead.  
  
"Maria, sweetheart, it's getting lat- oh. Michael. Umm, I didn't know you were here. Is everything okay out here with you kids?"  
  
Maria assured her Mom, "Yeah, Mom, everything's fine. Michael and I are just talking. Ten more minutes?"  
  
Amy nodded and agreed, "Okay. Ten more minutes, then in and straight to bed. Michael if you are too tired to go home, you may couch surf. Understand?"  
  
Michael saluted her with an awkward smile and acknowledged, "Yes, ma'am, Ms. DeLuca, copy that."  
  
Once Amy had gone back inside, Michael re-rolled the printed portrait, put it back in his pocket and resumed their conversation, "So will you go steady with me again? You still haven't answered."  
  
Maria touched his hand and answered, "I'm too emotional and tired to answer that question right now and stick to it in the harsh light of day. If you ask me tomorrow after lunch, then I'll probably be thinking clearly enough to give you an answer that I can stick to. If you don't ask, then that will be my proof you didn't really mean it anyway. Just out of curiosity, Michael, what will happen if I say no?"  
  
Michael kissed his fingertips, touched her cheek with the same fingers and answered, "You'll find out that you also don't have the market cornered on persistence. If your answer tomorrow is no, then I'll ask again the next day and the next day and the next day; you get the idea."  
  
Maria asked him with amusement in her tone, "Why would you tell me that if you actually want me to agree to take you back? You have to know how tempted I'll be to say no just to see some proof of persistence from you."  
  
Michael squeezed her hand briefly and answered, "That's easy. We've already established that you don't play around like that. You don't treat other people like crap. Not even jackasses like me. I should get going. Thanks for hearing me out, Maria. See you after lunch tomorrow." , and he stood up to go.  
  
Maria grabbed his hand and blurted, "Michael, wait!", and she stood up as well.  
  
Michael looked at her questioningly and prompted, "Okay. What is it?"  
  
Maria looked him in the eye and told him the truth, "I might say no, tomorrow, but right now I'm feeling really confused and hoping that I get to say yes instead and that I'll mean it. We still have time before I have to go in. This is just in case, because tomorrow I'll feel stronger ...", her voice trailed off and she slipped her arms around Michael's waist uncertainly, rested her ear against his heart and closed her eyes.  
  
She smiled in relief to feel his arms tighten around her, his hand stroking her hair and his lips pressed against her forehead, in a sustained kiss.  
  
After a few minutes, she pulled away first, to go inside. She stopped halfway through her front door and called out to him, "Michael? Thank-you. Goodnight."  
  
Michael nodded and answered, "I want what Liz wants; hope you sleep happy tonight. I think I might, too. Goodnight, Maria."  
  
 **DONE**


End file.
